And that is our different tastes in movies.  Or to put it another way, their complete inability to recognize my vastly superior opinion when it comes to movies.  (Did you notice the sudden silence emanating from Aurora?  That was my mom’s heart restarting as she realized I wasn’t going to say politics…).

Just to give you an idea of the chasm between our opinions, I asked my sisters to give me a list of their favorite movies.  Here’s what they said:

-Armageddon
-Cliffhanger
-Never Been Kissed
-Pirates of the Caribbean III (I just vomited a bit in my mouth)
-The Wedding Planner
-While You Were Sleeping
-Transformers (“one of the best movies EVER”)
-Point Break
-Ever After
-Win a Date with Tad Hamilton
-Sweet Home Alabama
-13 Going on 30
-Titanic!!!!!! (exclamations added by sister #3)

Do you see a pattern here? Explosions!  Romance!  Exploding romances!

To be fair, I asked my sisters to give their opinion on a couple of movies that I like. They could only summon up the strength to discuss two:

-Billy Elliot (dismissed as “the dumbest movie ever made” and then followed by mocking cries of “Dance, Kara! Dance!”)
-Best of Show (“that movie is so booooooooring” (side note – I originally wrote “boring” but was told it really needs the extra o’s to convey the depth of their pain))

Now, I don’t tell you this to make fun or mock but rather to warn you – I sometimes like movies that other people (i.e. my sisters) find disturbing, sad, or (gasp!) boring. And they sometimes like movies that I find ridiculous, predictable, and yes, boring (you can imagine how much fun movie night was at our house growing up).

So, in order to make this all neat and tidy, I’ve devised a highly complex, mathematical rating system, which consists of two categories – Movies My Sisters Might Like and Movies My Sisters are Guaranteed to Hate. Do with them what you will…

Movie My Sisters are Guaranteed to Hate:  4 months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days
This movie is serious, it’s intense and it’s one of the best movies I have seen in a very long time.  It’s one of those films (yes, I do believe this a “film” rather than simply a “movie”) where I wasn’t sure how I felt at the end (mainly because they don’t do any of the work for you); I just knew that I needed to process it for a really, really long time.  Bet you really want to see it now, don’t ya?

The movie follows two women as they struggle to set up an illegal abortion in communist Romania in the late 80s.  And listen, it does not look like it was a lot of fun to do anything in communist Romania, much less try and get an abortion.  It’s gray and depressing – just buying a pack of cigarettes takes sheer will, determination and street smarts.

But while it’s a movie very much about place, it’s also about people – real people, trying to love and be good friends and in one poignant scene, be polite, in this incredibly difficult, oppressive country.

And the acting is absolutely phenomenal.  Each scene was shot in one long take so the actors are acting for up to ten minutes at a time which is pretty much unheard of these days (as a point of reference, in typical Hollywood blockbuster, they will cut together scenes as often as every three seconds).

Now I know what you are all going to do.  You’re going to put it on your Netflix queue and it will sit there for the next year and you’ll keep looking at it and tell yourself that “next time” you’ll get it because right now you just need to laugh.  And the only reason I know you’re going to do this is because I do it all the time but I swear, if you like this kind of movie, you will be so glad you moved it to the the top of the queue.  I’ll accept your thanks in the form of crisp dollar bills or bars of chocolate.

Movie My Sisters Might Like:  Son of Rambow
WARNING: This is actually a foreign movie even though it’s on Film My Sisters Might Like List. It’s only British though, so it’s barely a foreign film. (And before you get all fired up, I have to tell you, I’m allowed to say that because I am engaged to a Barely Foreigner.  Which is NOT FAIR AT ALL.  I started out dating Chris-the-Brit (“If you wouldn’t mind giving me a ring back on my mobile…”) yet I’ll be marrying a Chris-the-Practically-American (“Hey Babe, give me a call when you have a sec.”).  What happened?!?!?  Fortunately, he has me to keep him on his toes and make sure he doesn’t completely lose his accent… “It’s not the trunk, Chris.  It’s the boot!  The boot!  C’mon, say it with me!  Put it in the boot.”  How lucky is he, huh?)

Now after watching 4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days, you are going to need something a bit more…uplifting, shall we say?  So, go and rent Son of Rambow, a little movie about the friendship between two boys, who decide to enter a film competition with an action/adventure home movie.  They come from two totally different backgrounds (one is a troublemaker with non-existent parents, the other comes from a Plymouth Brethren religious sect so strict he’s forbidden to watch movies) but find common ground in Rambo: First Blood (further proof that boys really are weird).

This movie is exactly what a coming-of-age drama/comedy should be.  It’s funny, it’s sad and it captures all of the drama and excitement of coming into your own as a kid (and makes you pretty darn glad that you never have to go through it again).  I loved it, Chris loved it, the friends we went with loved it.  I’ll have to get back to you on my sisters.